Warehouse Wednesdays: No Pain No Gain
Usually when I’m saying to myself, “No pain, no gain,” it is as I’m teetering down the sidewalk in strappy heels with blisters forming. Then the blisters start bleeding so I take them off and slip in to ballet slippers and think, “My god what a stupid saying.” In recent years my wearing of heels had decreased substantially as I realized that bloody feet weren’t all that attractive and I had not tolerance for how my feet looked even if I had built up a tolerance for the pain. But if the pain refers to Myka’s head of hair, I have to say, Woman, at least pull a comb through it! Sheesh. I don’t have much tolerance for her disheveled look this season. I quite like curly hair, and as my best friend as struggled with her own over the years, I know it is a pain to control. But a good cut and stylist can go a long way, and I’ve got to think that Joanne Kelly has access to these seeing as she’s on a television show!
Ok, Rant over.
Artie discovers that a hockey player is healing far too rapidly, it must be the result of an artifact, so he sends Myka and Pete to chase it down. Claudia gets invited out to lunch by Mrs. F, which leaves Jinks and Artie together in the Warehouse. Artie says something and Jinks realizes that he’s lying, so Jinks follows Artie around and confronts him. Artie has taken seriously the threat from Data the Monk that he would destroy Artie’s life’s work and is cataloging what artifacts have gone missing. Which is strange because the Warehouse is supposed to alert Artie when an artifact has gone missing, but the alert system is not working. Artie is so distraught by the artifact of doom’s repercussions and his life’s work being destroyed, that Jinks is the one who comes up with a solution. Find out if one part of a pair of artifacts has gone missing, use the second part of the pair of artifacts to find the first and maybe the rest of the artifacts. Using a rifle they hunt down and find several of them missing artifacts, but packaging supplies in the garage where the artifacts have been hidden, indicate there is a least one more artifact out there floating around. At this point the suspension of the artifact of doom and Artie’s demise has been strung along for so long, that it is lost on me and I find myself cleaning up the living room while Artie is on the screen.
Claudia and Mrs. F go on a walk about. Mrs. F asks Claudia to feel the surrounding people, and and Claudia is witness to the birth of an artifact. Mrs. F tells her that they only take away artifacts when they start to harm people. Oh, really? OK. What about JUST LAST WEEK where the whole friggin episode was about how EVERY SINGLE artifact has a downside? Huh? While Mrs. F is more in line with how the artifacts have been viewed over the years on this show, the switcheroo from week to week is wearing my believability (it’s a word) in the Warehouse Universe thin. But it is obvious that Mrs. F is trying to teach Claudia some of the subtleties of the artifacts because she is possibly grooming Claudia to be the next Mrs. F (i.e. Caretaker of the Warehouse). This requires that Mrs. F also show the downside to her connection with the Warehouse, mostly to the effect that she has lived so long her grandson is a grey haired old man in a nursing home. Definitely some food for thought for poor Claudia, who hasn’t even been to collage yet. I’m not sure she is even old enough to drink yet. (Goes and googles this)
Claudia is neither a Special Agent, nor a Criminal Research Specialist, because she does not yet meet the USA’s minimum age requirement of 21-years old. She is however, as of season 3, a fully active Warehouse agent and often partnered with Steve Jinks, “the new guy”.
Warehouse 13 Wiki. Well, I think she must turn 21 this year, but still, very young to be being groomed as Caretaker of the Warehouse. Poor Claudia.
Once again, the real fun story, the one that inadvertently paused my living room cleaning, is the Myka and Pete story. It was hilarious, interesting, and sweet all at the same time. Myka and Pete track down Mr. Hockey (not his real name or his characters name) and question him as well as go through his personal affects. Myka is all hostile towards him, mostly because he is hitting on her, and she thinks he is using the artifact himself. But then Myka and Pete do some deductive work after talking with the team owner (played by Lassiter from Psych) and reason that it must be a fan who is using the artifact. The fan is a crazy blond chick (played by Kirsten Nelson from Psych) with a key chain who gets upset when Mr. Hockey kisses Myka on camera. Pete is looking through fan bags when he accidentally uses the artifact and gets Myka pregnant. The artifact makes wishes come true, and Crazy Blond has been using it to wish Mr. Hockey better and when Pete touches the key chain, which has dog tags on it that were turned into an artifact during WWII when one buddy urged another buddy on to safety or he would have died, Pete was thinking about the life he lives and he is probably never going to be with someone who will always have his back and have his children, and some how Myka is pregnant.
Crazy Blond is gone when Pete and Myka finally put all the pieces together and she has kidnapped Mr. Hockey. She does this by wishing his arm broken. Gaugh. Crazy crazy. Or CrayCray as some of my friends would say. In a show down with Crazy Blond Myka looses the tesla stun gun and can’t pick it up because she’s uber pregnant. Pete puts down his real gun and the Crazy Blond wishes him to die and he begins to collapse. Walking away from the pregnant Myka Crazy Blond is full of glee until she is tesla’d by Myka who somehow got the tesla gun up into her hands by hooking it with her toe THROUGH HER SHOES. What? Or at least I did not see a barefoot Myka. Is this why people are always talking about barefoot, pregnant, and in the kitchen? They need their toes to pick up things? Pete gets the dog tags and bags them and they get Mr. Hockey to the hospital. Myka comes out of Mr. Hockey’s room to find Pete watching a man hold his newborn baby. ::Sadface:: Pete makes me ::sadface:: Booo.
An interesting episode with some drawn out story lines. This season’s overarching arc is just not interesting to me, sadly. But I have enjoyed the Myka and Pete parts as their friendship grows without delving into them having the hots for each other. They are obvious partners, who love each other, and always have each other’s backs. Pete was quite funny in his “You go girl” moments and I hope one day he gets his wish of a family and little Petes running around. Now that Artie knows about the Jinks and Claudia link, I wonder if he will be able to find a way to get Jinks off the metronome before Claudia is really hurt.