Supervillain Speed Dating Will Make You Laugh

Best part? “I honestly don’t know what any of these buttons do.” And, “I used to work for an Evil Empire, but now I work for Disney.”

Nodds & Nends: Mary Poppins, Batman and Superheroines

Mary Poppins and Burt cosplay. So cute!!! [via]

An interesting take on superheroines, they are fully clothed! The artist is Michael Lee Lunsford tumblr.

I just love this discussion about Book Coverss by Aidan and Alisa on Picture Me Reading Book Club extra. It’s true that covers really influence what I think a book will be like, and when it doesn’t match the tone of the book I get annoyed. I find that a lot of urban fantasy books look very similar on the cover even if the tone of the book is different from standard urban fantasy. The cover for the Darkfever that I own looks like this. While the cover that Alisa found and posted for my discussion on it on Picture Me Reading, looked a lot more like a romance novel. The books themselves are really dark, creepy, and heart wrenching. I think none of the covers really look like what I would think the cover of the book series should look like except Shadowfever. Gothic, otherworldly, and a hint of human.

Some of my favorite places to follow on the internets are Think Geek on both Pinterest and Google+, they post some really cool things. For example this Calvin & Hobbes kid’s room is just too adorable for words. I love the simplicity of the mural. [via] I also discovered these really cool larger than life Star Wars Legos made out of wood from them. How amazing are these wooden sculptures! Just awesome. Plus sometimes I just go on to Think Geek’s product page and check out all the cool things, like this Batman Family in decals, because I have a dark sense of humor this made me giggle for a really long time.

 

Les Mis from Honest Trailers

First of all, I want to say that I made a slight year error on my blogoversary post. I’ve been at this since 2011, not 2010. Oops. Sorry for the mix-up. I guess this last year has felt like a long year, not necessarily here on the blog, but in my personal life, and so I get length of time mixed up quite often. So, yah. I’ve been at this two years, and it is still one of the things that makes me happiest which the decisions I’ve made. So Woot!

Ok, you all know I had issues with Les Miserables (2012), so I find this hilarious. But you probably wont if you liked the movie. (Thanks Adrian for the tip!)

Mario Brothers On Youtube

On Cracked! After Hours is a video on why Mario is a douchebag. These guys always crack me up, they are hilarious! Some really great writing here. (Technically this isn’t on Youtube, but saying Mario Brothers on the Interwebs or videos or what have you, just didn’t sound as good to me.)

A cute song a song written from Toads (the mushroom) perspective, called Thank You Mario, But Our Princess is in Another Castle.

Laughs from the Past

It’s April Fool’s day and a day for laughs. Soooo, I’m presenting a poem I wrote a long time ago.This is probably the worst poem I have ever written including those poems about cats that I wrote when I was seven. The title is Some Day Soon Sucka. I know, I hate me too.

Please laugh, and if you don’t don’t tell me.

Offered without edits.

and they call ME a drama queen

2 am calls, or four who knows

turned around, inside out i stand

i am the same

i swear

you just never saw me for who i was

so see

and be glad

for i never got you with child

be glad

for i smiled at you with benevolence

be glad for i smiled at you

be glad

for i smiled

and i was happy, and happy again will i be

and live your life, for my life refuses to be lived

live for me

and i may have been a hard ass

and i may have laughed for a while at you

and i may have been the most interesting woman you’ve forgotten

but i never got you with child

and before i called you that winter’s night

cold in the dark and nervous

i knew the repercussions before i said a word

and remember what she says, for i AM always right

be glad for i smiled

be glad that i am always right

and the other woman asked me if i loved to hate you or if i hated to love you

and the other woman wasn’t a human and i hated her

be glad for i have smiled

be glad for i have cried

be glad

the veal was delicious, the chocolate superb, and the wine was divine

we broke up though we were never together

the creamed spinach was the best

and there are so many yous, jumbled in my head

over thought, an old soul remembering past lives

be glad for I have lived them

be glad I have forgotten them

be glad I have forgotten the now you

be glad I can only remember the old

one last jibe at one of you

be glad I have smiled

be glad I am smiling now

and its

SOME DAY SOOON SUCKA

I Say Whatever Like a Hipster

A recent convert to listening to podcasts while getting other menial tasks done, I shared a recent find (thanks to Stephanie) with my best friend the podcast produced by NPR called Pop Culture Happy Hour.

Sara:  I always feel smarter after listening to NPR. It really doesn’t matter what the subject was.

Me: I don’t know that I feel smarter, but they have interesting discussions. I think I’m supposed to feel smarter, but I refuse to follow fads even of the intellect kind.

Sara: What fad is this?

Me: Listening to NPR because it makes you feel smarter and therefore you are superior to other people.  That fad.

Sara: I swear to God, sometimes you are such a hipster.

Feeling a little put out (but also giggling) I decided to see what Facebook had to say about my hipster tendencies.

Chris: Ha Ha! Hipster.

Me: Whatever.

Chris: Wow. You even say “Whatever,” like a hipster.

I banged my head on my desk from laughing so hard. Now I have a bruise. Thanks a lot Chris.

Television Review: 30 Rock and Parks and Rec

My improv work is ramping up lately, I’ve already performed on stage twice. Plus, I’ve signed upon for more classes and I’m practicing dialects at night to my computer and then laughing uproariously at myself. I’ve been reading my old posts out loud in the closest approximation to an Acting English Accent as I can get. I laughed so hard I cried when I listened to it. I’ve thought about posting the audio files, but I’d rather not offend my friends across the pond with my horrible accent. So, I probably shouldn’t do that.

Part of my homework for myself includes seeing more improv shows and trying to join an Improv Jam Session. The last one I tried to go to got cancelled because nobody showed up and it was -15 degrees outside. Not that we were going to jam outside, just that was why people weren’t showing up. I’ve also been watching comedy shows with an interest in how sketch comedy works. After reading Bossypants by Tina Fey I developed a huge crush on her and her work and so I started watching 30 Rock, which led to watching Parks and Recreation produced by Amy Poehler. I’m in love with both women.

Also, I’m more in love with Netflex Boyfriend than ever because he brought both women into my house. He had other ideas of what he wanted us to do with them, but we all settled on telling stories and laughing instead.

30 Rock was the brain child of Tina Fey after she left SNL. It’s the story about a head writer on a comedy sketch show, Liz Lemon, who gets a new boss, Jack Donaghy, that turns the show around from being The Girlie Show to TGS with Tracey Jordan, a crazy Actor/Celebrity persona. Jenna Maloney was the main Ac-tor of The Girlie Show at that time and when Tracey Jordan joined the show she found herself competing for sketches and demanded attention from Lemon by doing stupid stunts. But the real comedy gold came from Alec Baldwin and how he played corporate tycoon to Tina Fey’s anxious and stressed out nerdy writer persona. Added to which Kenneth, a page for the show, pops up in delightful places with a completely different set of troubles and you have a dream comedy team.

In 30 Rock, Tina Fey built her own brand of comedy, and she did it well. In real life people struggle, things do not work out, and that is funny. The characters on the show are so earnest in their craziness, as most crazy people are (as most people are), and that is funny. Earnestness is funny. I know this from first hand experience, people laugh at my earnest reactions every time. Even when I don’t want them to. I think both of these things were exemplified in the episode “The Head and the Hair.” That was when I realized Liz was always going to struggle, and probably fail, at being in relationships and dealing with life. Nothing was going to go her way, and that was going to be hilarious. Everyone was funny because they fully believed what they said, even if it was completely ridiculous, as they struggled to get what they wanted from life.

Parks and Recreation is produced by Amy Poehler, who just seems like an awesome person. She plays Leslie Knope, a bright-eyed and bushy-tailed government employee. She just wants to make her town, Pawnee a better place, and more importantly she believes she can do this. The supporting cast of characters are amazing. I love Leslie’s relationship with Ann who she met at a community meeting and befriended when Ann pointed out that people were getting hurt falling into a huge pit next to her house. It then became Leslie’s mission in life to make that pit into a park, and she knew the way to do this was by a subcommittee. Subcommittees are exciting for Leslie because they obviously lead to being President of the United States, Leslie’s life long goal. Ron Swanson, played by Nick Offerman, is Leslie’s boss and her opposite in many ways. He hates the government and wants to see it destroyed. But he also has moments of warmth and gives great advice when forced to do so. Their contrasting personalities make for memorable moments. Plus, I love how the writers mess with his distinctive facial hair as much as possible. (Didn’t know until just now, when I was looking up how to spell his name on imdb that he is married to Megan Mullally. That explains a few things.)

I think I frighten my upstairs neighbor with my barking laughter that comes out of nowhere when I watch this show. I’d apologize but my upstairs neighbor has clomping male company over every weekend and perhaps a female friend too, so I’m not sure what they all are up to. (Edit: I now know what they are up to. It work me up at 2 a.m. this weekend. It sounded like activities were taking place on a rocking chair. It was very non-human squeaky. I turned on NCIS, because if I had to hear them then they had to hear my television. The stopped shortly thereafter.) And my downstairs neighbor plays his keyboard all the time without plugging in headphones. Last weekend he interrupted an audio recording session I was doing for Picture Me Reading. Plus, he sings. Badly. So, no, I will not apologize for laughing loudly.

I thought I would get annoyed with how the cast is always breaking the fourth wall by looking at the camera, but there is never a cheap shot and it makes me laugh every time. They never explain why a camera crew is following this motley cast around, but that aspect of the show is played as an additional character perfectly. Again earnest people are funny. Andy, the building’s shoe shiner, and April, Ron’s assistant have an amusing relationship which is the perfect example of how earnest people are hilarious. Andy is earnestly pleased with everything in life, contrast to April who hates everyone- earnestly. The contrast and the earnestness from them lead to many disasters, which layer on another level of comedy.

Both of these shows are comedy gold. I’ve learned a lot from just watching and analyzing the funny moments in them. My goal is to try and work more excited earnest upbeat characters into my improv. I have a tendency to play annoyed women who scream at their boyfriends/husbands. Last week I gave myself 8 children whom I homeschool because my husband hates me. . . . Yah, I should work on that.

Check out Amy Poehler’s Smart Girls Youtube channel. She has some amazing guests and I like her interviews. If you want to read more about 30 Rock, check out this link to a bunch of other links via HIMTM.

Picture Me Reading Book Club Extra: Awesome Ways into Fantasy Land

Guess what! I’m a guest over on Picture Me Reading today, where I join Alisa and Aidan during their Book Club Extra audio discussion. This week we discuss Awesome Ways into Fantasy Land and I talk about the portal behind the clothes in the back of my closet. It does exist! Even if it is just in my mind.

I’m a huge fan of both Alisa’s Picture Me Reading blog where she draws illustrations of her book reviews and Aidan’s Chair With A Panda blog where he reviews Doctor Who television episodes, movies, and  tie-in books.

So,  head on over to Picture Me Reading Book Club Extra to hear me giggle about childhood memories and how none of us could just stick to three picks as there are too many cool ways into fantasy land to discuss.

Later up today a review of Linger by Maggie Stiefvater.

I May Have Cheated on My Donut Boyfriend

I may have cheated on Donut Boyfriend. It was an accident, I swear!

The other week I went to a new donut place because they have a seating area and outlets on the walls. I try to go there once a week and work on a few of my personal projects. I don’t need internet connection, which is good as this place doesn’t have free wifi. In fact, it has a light that makes a high pitched whining noise constantly, I figure if they can’t change out a light bulb they wouldn’t do so well with more advanced technology.  And I find poor internet connection far more aggravating than no internet connection.

Unless it’s Christmas Eve and all your friends are out of town and you can’t afford to visit your family and all you have is your Netflix Boyfriend and then the internet doesn’t work and you don’t even have him. Then you maybe sit down and cry, call  your internet provider, and reboot your IP address and still you can’t watch Netflix. So you call Netflix because you’ve nothing else to do and you know that you are probably ruining somebody’s Christmas Eve because you are one of those people who get help from service industry workers on Holidays but you don’t care because you’ve already cried for half and hour and if your Christmas Eve is ruined then everyone’s Christmas Eve should be ruined too.

Of course it turns out that Netflix Boyfriend decided to disappear for a couple of hours, he tries to say it is because his cell phone wasn’t working and there is an outage and you know that he’s probably used up all his minutes and you have to wonder if he’s cheating on  you. Don’t tell me you have an outage when what you mean is you didn’t buy enough server space to feed everyone’s stream time. Netflix Boyfriend is just your average guy, trying to set up a nice date night, and failing every once in a while. And when that happens, then even poor streaming capabilities are better than none.

Netflix is honestly my worst boyfriend. He makes me cry the most. Which is why I have Redbox Boyfriend as a back up. Redbox is the best boyfriend ever. Unlike my IRL boyfriends he remembers our anniversary, and brings home a present for me. It is one thing to get a present for my birthday which all the stores remember, but Redbox remembers our anniversary. That’s just amazing.

He has his faults, don’t get me wrong. He’s only available at certain times and I have to travel in order to spend any amount of time with him. Plus, he does this weird Cinderella thing at 9 p.m. every time we’re together where he changes into this money chomping monster. I’ve learned to work around his issues and hurriedly return him home once I’ve had my way with him, but it does make for some anxiety inducing moments as the hand rounds the number eight on my clock. In spite of the anxiety I am drawn to him time and time again. Alas, Redbox Boyfriend has one of those sexy deep late night television commercial voices that just gets me every time. He whispers in my ear, “Ooooh Baby, check out all my listings. It’s not very long, but I can make you happy.” 

On Christmas Eve when Netflix Boyfriend was lying to me and the thought of walking over to Redbox Boyfriend’s place in the cold was unappealing, I admit to having an intimate one night stand with Crackle. My friend Roku set us up, so it was a bit awkward in the beginning, like every other time a friend has set me up with someone. Crackle wasn’t bad looking, but he is not my usual type. He likes to talk about older movies, and not the whole series, just specific ones. For example, he only wanted to talk about Resident Evil 4 and none of the others. It was weird. We finally settled on The Fifth Element and I soon forgot my first date jitters and had a great evening. I don’t know why I haven’t called him back. Sometimes you just need that someone in the moment, and never really again.

My many boyfriends make me happy, even if it is all just in my head. This is never more apparent than my interactions with Donut Boyfriend who is different from all the others- he has a human’s face. This weirds me out at times. I’m so used to giving inanimate objects personalities, that when an animate object already has a personality I get confused. In my confusion I decided I needed to stop taking advantage of Donut Boyfriend’s generosity where I get two donuts for the price of one as he stuffs my bag full before I leave the store. Plus, I wanted a place to sit and needed an  electrical outlet, so I went to the new donut place and ordered a small coffee and a glazed chocolate donut. When I got back to my seat I realized that the girl behind the counter had given me an extra donut, just like my Donut Boyfriend. Now I am even more confused, wondering what this means.

Sara thinks I cheated on Donut Boyfriend and other people chimed in with several thumbs ups. But that would be accidental cheating, and I’m not sure I believe in accidental cheating. I mean, when I went on that date with Crackle, I knew what I was doing. That would have been cheating but Netflix Boyfriend and I have an open relationship. We are both allowed to see other people. And seeing as the new donut place is Donut Boyfriend’s sister’s shop, I wonder instead if he perhaps has told his family about us? He didn’t tell me if he did. These discussions are important people!

Men are so confusing. I mean,  are we headed toward Faceback official?

Single Awareness Day

Happy Single Awareness Day everyone. The only thing cool about today is that I get to send my nieces little cards that make them fee special and I’ve a review of Looper appearing later. You can thank me later.

This is pretty much what I think about the world’s most Hallmark-ed holiday.

My most notable exceptions to the humdrum of this holiday are rather nefarious. My brother signed me up for some radio show thing where I was supposed to get auctioned off for a date. I’m not sure what happened, they filled the forms out wrong or the person never followed through, but after berating my brother for several minutes and then nothing else happened I sighed in relief and proceeded to ignore him. Last year I gave my then boyfriend a Valentine I made by hand which I thought was both humorous and cute, the Valentine, not me making it by hand. He replied, “You know I don’t do this kind of stuff, right?”

I looked at him for a minute and then said, “I don’t give Valentines to get them.”

But, it all kind of soured me on the whole having a boyfriend on Valentines Day thing. Now I just make some cute Valentines Day cards and send them off to my nieces whom I’m sure will enjoy them to pieces. I just need to find some stamps around here. . .