Television Review: Warehouse Wednesday: Love Sick

I know this is late. It couldn’t be helped as my DVR was acting up yesterday, my normal evening for reviewing the series. I finally got it working at 11 p.m. right before I fell exhausted into bed. But, here it is, if a little towards a Warehouse Thursday.(There might be more grammar and spelling errors, because I typed quickly and published without really editing.)

I thought this was a good episode where Artie and Claudia travel to Salt Lake City to handle and artifact while Myka and Pete get to know Jinks. I like that the characters are divided up differently than the last episode and we get to see how the chemistry works with the new division. There were several laugh out loud moments for me, well chuckle out loud anyway. Warehouse 13 is back to form with an abundance of artifacts to learn about and relationships to watch.

The episode opens in Salt Lake City, in an ER where a body shows up caked and dried up. Attempts to resuscitate result in blown up ER equipment. The CDC is called in as more bodies with the same symptoms arrive and die. Low and behold it is Artie’s love interest, the doctor. I have a small problem with this scenario. Frankly, it is weird to me that Artie has a love interest, he seems so asexual to me. The mad scientist who doesn’t think about women that way. The romance feels forced.The doctor tells the ER attendant that she is going to call in an expert.

Back at the Warehouse Artie is getting ready to leave. Without telling everyone why. They of course pester him for the truth. Claudia even exclaims, “You trimmed your eyebrows.” And accurately guesses that he is going to see his lady doctor friend. Artie explains that the doctor needs him because she thinks that there is an artifact causing the dirt bodies in the hospital. Claudia demands to go along with Artie. She reminds him that he faints at the sight of blood. This, I don’t remember. But Artie agrees. As they walk out the door, Pete asks, Are you wearing spanx. Do they *make* spanx for men? A Google search assures me there is such a thing.

At the hospital Artie becomes tongue-tied around the doctor and the unusual deaths. Claudia makes a Dark Knight reference that Artie doesn’t get, but the doctor does saying, “Riddle me this Batgirl.” Um ok, that was awesome. They discover that the tissue removed from the dead person is in fact clay, and there are three other bodies just the same. It is an artifact out break.

The next morning at the warehouse Pete is sleeping with a blond girl all curled up around him. She wakes up at the same time he does, they look at each other and scream. It is Myka in a blond wig, and somehow they are in Artie’s bed naked. Ok, WTF? Is this some kind of lust transference artifact? I mean the doctor is a graying blond. Pete stands there with a sheet around his waist looking too yummy for words. Ok, I’ll say the words. Eddie McClintock, you have a body that I just want to nibble. Myka finishes freaking out about them being naked and starts to freak about her hair instead.

Screen still from the episode

At the hospital Artie has a special contraption that scans the DNA of the person. Claudia makes a Golden Girls reference while they talk about the DNA results, and both the doctor and Artie give her “the look.” She skulks off. Artie realizes he is alone and bumbles his way around to asking the doctor out. But only once they find out what is wrong with the clay people of course.

Myka and Pete are clothed and trying to figure out how they ended up naked in Artie’s room with a toothbrush. Can I just say here, that I love that before they woke up screaming they were all cuddly. ::giggle:: Now they are all, (deep voice here) getting to the bottom of things. They play the rewind-er thingy m’bob that plays back the last five hours trying to discover what happened while they slept. Pete gets excited because he almost sees one of Myka’s breast during the show. “This is not funny.” She tells him. “Could be.” He mutters. I’m with Pete on this one. They discover that Pete called someone.

At that moment Artie calls, apparently returning Pete’s voice message earlier with him singing  the pina colada song. Pete passes it off as previous silliness and asks Artie, don’t you like walks in the rain? I bet he does as long as they are walks with the doctor. 😉 Pete asks him if his toothbrush has any significance. Artie treats that absurd statement for what it is, and Pete and Myka are back to square one. Myka hypothesizes that it must be an artifact, and scans for artifact uprisings the night before. At this point they finally realizes that Jinks is nowhere to be found, they call his cell phone and it rings in the office.

At the hospital Claudia, Artie, and the doctor are analyzing the genome of the clay people and Artie discovers a code in the genome sequence, a computer code. Then we see some creepy computer guy watching a woman disrobing and dancing in matching yellow bra and panties set. Something jumps from the computer and attacks her eyes. This is obviously not good. She leaves wet foot prints as she stumbles away. Meanwhile, Claudia and Artie greet an old friend. It is Hugo! Who now lives in Eureka. I love the cross overs!! Hugo is excited to work on a human/computer virus. The doctor comes to join the group and it is apparent that he knows the doctor very well and that they used to work at the warehouse together.The yellow bra lady shows up as another victim.

Myka and Pete are trying to track down which artifact went wonky first the night before. They walk around calling out for Jinks. Pete sits down on this huge electricity looking thing, and shock of all shocks he gets electrocuted (sorry, I couldn’t resist). It is the tesla target coil thing, and it is still on. Suddenly Pete remembers that they had decided to practice their tesla aiming the night before after Jinks told them he was gay (and Pete decided to show off his body again. I mean I like his body, but inappropriate Pete, inappropriate).

Flashback: Pete is excited that someone would actually appreciate his body. Jinks reaction was great. The numbers on Pete’s shirt seem oddly out-of-place. 362947, they have got to mean something. But I have no effing clue. People on the internet are guessing at html code for colors and football jersey numbers (frankly, unreliable sources that seem rather troll-y). Myka is not amused with Pete’s antics and tells him to put his shirt back on. They go and shoot the tesla at the recoil thing instead and Jinks comments that it is not as easy as it looks in the movie. Pete makes an awesome comment that the Storm Troopers in the Star Wars movies are shooting ray guns and never seem to get their targets either. TOTALLY AWESOME Star Wars reference!!!

By Michael Neel from Knoxville, TN, USA (Star Wars) [CC-BY-2.0 (, via Wikimedia Commons

Pete accurately shoots the ray gun but in his excitement falls into shelving and juggling balls roll off the top shelf and Pete and Myka catch the balls before their crash to the ground. Myka and Pete began to giggle like 15 year-olds, or drunk people. Steve looks puzzled. Then they discover that the juggling balls drugged them. Buzzed the gang follows the trail of the acting up artifacts and discover that Myka was blond because she used Marilyn Monroe’s brush. In the present time Pete comments that if he had been drugged he would have slept with somebody. Myka and Pete look at each other in horror. Frankly, that is too easy. Jinks maybe?

Claudia and Artie check out the victim’s apartment and discover that her computer stuff is all from the same place. So they go to the computer place just as the creepy computer guy is fired for using the company computers to spy on girls. Artie, the doctor, Hugo, and Claudia show up right after he is fired, and learn from the manager what had just happened. Claudia runs out of the store to hunt him down. Just after she leaves the creepy computer guy sends a message to his ex-employer by hacking their computers and t.v.s. He then makes the whole place go dark and yellow sparks jump out of the screens. Artie realizes what is happening and saves him and the doctor from getting infected. But everyone else, including Hugo, has caught the virus. The doctor declares a CDC emergency and quarantines the store. Hugo begins to write an anti-virus for when they, hopefully, find the artifact causing all this trouble.

Myka and Pete find Richard Nion’s shoes next and decide to have an awkward conversation about what if they had slept together. Pete says, very sweetly, that if it happened they would just put it behind them because nothing should come between them from being really good friends and partners. At that moment Pete discovers that Jinks has been bronzed. Flashback: Pete is acting upset about loosing his shoes (really Nixon’s shoes) and Jinks finds them and goes to get them. He steps into the bronzer and Pete shuts the door. He gets bronzed and Pete and Myka take pictures of him and them. But when they try to unbronze him, their spit wont match the DNA recordings. Pete realizes this must be why they had the toothbrush.

screen still from the episode

At the store Hugo is failing rapidly and says he doesn’t want to die. He still cares for the doctor and carries a picture of her around in his pocket, one that he drew from memory at while institutionalized. Hugo asks Artie if he found someone. Artie says, “Emet.” Hug goes, I didn’t know you were a homosexual. Are you what they call a bear? I laughed at this, both times I watched the episode. But Artie explains that it is the Hebrew word for truth, that it comes from the Jewish myth of the gollum and has something to do with the Creepy Computer guy’s necklace. Artie calls Claudia and lets her know what to look for.

The manager freaks out and when the doctor tries to calm him down, yellow sparks shoot from him to her. The virus transfers between humans, it is mutating and getting stronger. Claudia chases down the creepy computer guy and gets him to help her while Hugo finishes the anti-virus. They throw the necklace through the window just as Artie throw black stuff on the window that lets the necklace pass through. They save everyone in the store.

Pete and Myka use Artie’s toothbrush to de-bronze Jinks. Flashback: Myka remembers that she made them get naked and in bed together because they were both about to pass out from the effects of the juggling balls. She knew that if they woke up naked next to each other they would both try to figure out what happened, find Jinks, and de-bronze him. In fact that is what happens. Jinks stepped out of the bronzer confused, Myka and Pete pass it off like nothing happened.

Artie and the doctor talk while ambulances sound in the back ground. Artie tries to get out of the date, but the doctor wont let him. She explains that she doesn’t care for Hugo because he remembers who she was. And while she will always have her younger self as a part of her, she is that person no longer. Artie likes her for who she is now. She kisses Artie on the cheek and makes Claudia squeal. Note, I say cheek. And I really just don’t see Artie making out, or kissing anyone. This bugs me. Why is he the one with a love interest. Sigh.

The computer creeper gets arrested. But then  the policeman acts all weird. Low and behold the evil FBI lady arrives and they all drive off together.

Dun Dun DUN. And my wrists hurt and I’m tired. But that was a really good episode, and I’m further intrigued what this FBI lady is doing as the bad guy. Can’t wait for next weeks episode.

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